I am moving in two weeks.
To another province. Closer to my family. To a city I have been to only twice before.
I am excited. And I am terrified.
I don't know what to expect. I am terrified that I won't make any friends this summer. That I will sit alone in my apartment Monday to Thursday waiting for the weekend when I can go and visit my parents.
I am terrified that I will feel just as sad and alone there, as I do here. That the fresh start won't mean anything, because it is me that is still broken.
I know that from the outside, to my friends and to my family, I am doing really well. But I am still struggling. Night time is still hard. When everything is quiet. It reminds me how very alone I am.
As soon as I move to the new city I am going to start looking for a new therapist. I stopped seeing mine back in December, but with the chaos of this move, I feel like I need some extra support.
I feel like I am in a slump, and I'm not sure how to get out.