One of the things that people told me all the time was "don't worry, you're young, you have lots of time to meet someone".
That. Felt. Terrible.
I don't feel young. I feel old. I was four months away from my wedding. I was planning my next house, with a bigger kitchen, and a backyard big enough for a swing set. I was ready to start making babies, and creating a family.
I don't feel young. Because for as long as I can remember, I have wanted to get married, and have a family. Now, I am not someone who have been planning my wedding since I was a little girl. I hadn't really thought much about my wedding at all until I was engaged. But, I had been planning my marriage.
I have wanted a husband and a brood of kids since I, myself, was a kid. I have wanted to have someone to share my life with, and someone to raise a family with. I have always felt like I would have children young. I wanted to have 1.5 kids before I was thirty. And I have wanted that since I was about 11.
So, telling me that I am "so young" and that I have "so much time" was awful. I don't feel young.
This is the oldest I have ever been. I have nothing else to compare it to.
And, I know that I can have all of those things. And I know that eventually I will have them. And I know that I just have to be patient, and let this pass, and to let the universe do its work for me.
And I know that I am young.
But for now, I feel old.
(This is not me. Really.)